Why are you here? Are you just using the posters as a sounding board or do you really and truly want to save your marriage and have your wife return to the marriage? If you want to try to save your marriage, then you need to open your ears and listen to what the posters have been advising you for many weeks. Open your eyes and look around you. What you've been doing isn't working...so try something different.
Snooping is ramping up your anxiety and obsession in trying to get her back. It's not going to work...the more you push, the more she's going to run in the opposite direction. Being needy and desperate isn't very becoming in your wife's eyes right now. You need to change the way you are dealing w/your life right now. You need to become the man she fell in love with who was a confident, self-assured and independent man. Show her that man again. Acknowledge the fact that she's got to have that time and space to figure things out.
The posters here have been where you are, myself included. The best thing you can do is let her go and have faith and hope that she will see the light....but she's not going to see the light as long as you are there. She needs to see and sense that you have moved forward w/your life. Moving forward doesn't necessarily mean dating, but it means living your life to the fullest each and every day. Making the changes that you need to make to be a better man and one that will shine throughout the day and night. When she senses that you are going on w/your life, that is when she'll begin to question herself and what she is doing and begin to see the new and improved your.
Curtis, time is precious...time doesn't stand still for any of us. It's important to use that time wisely and that means keeping the focus on you and your family and living your life as if she may not return. Continue to have faith and hope for those two things will help you each and every day...but you need to allow the man upstairs to work on your wife and stop taking the wheel back from him as he is still attempting to work on her.
Keep the focus on YOU!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
