I just cant fathom why the process hasn't started yet. If it can take months to years for a D to be finalized. We could still live together to survive if need be even if we divorced or separated...so why won't she start the process? Not saying I like that option but it would not be much different (in living arrangements) compared to where we are now except that I could pursue other relationships when/if I'm ready and she could pursue OM without the guilt, lies and secrets.
Just read this sentence again. I don't think she really wants it Do you want it? Do you want to pursue other women?
I've said this before and it's hard for people to understand If an spouse decides they don't want a D or doesn't do anything to start the D, that doesn't automatically mean they want to work on the M. It's not binary. There will be a long period of just doing not much. Now many LBS cant' handle this and despite claims they are standing for their marriage initiate the D. Patience is something that is absolute required.
I know a lot of vets will require their spouse to say they are working on the M. But that comes in many forms. the spouse has to work on the M in their own way and work on themselves.
I don't know where your W is in this process but it's never as fast and as clear as we would like.
THIS^^^^^^^^^
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
