My understanding is mediation works when both parties are trying to be amicable and there is no significant power imbalance.
We both profess to wanting an amicable D. But on the power front, my W seems very controlling and unpredictable to me. Rather than negotiate with someone digging in their heels in a position far off from what is legally “normal”, I feel it might give me peace of mind to handle this through L’s.
I think you and/or your wife are misunderstanding mediation. Mediation isn't (and shouldn't be) to give one party an advantage or better deal. It's just a chance to try to negotiate a settlement between the parties. it's to give party's a fair chance to discuss and resolve the outstanding issues. You don't need a lawyer for mediation, but some have it
Also, most likely...even with Ls you will have a negotiated settlement. The vast vast majority of divorce cases in the US do not go to any sort of trial. People see mediation as less expensive because you don't have to have a L. But it doesn't mean that it will be quick or easy just because you call it mediation. The role of mediator is to facilitate the agreement - not to make decisions.
If your W is making wild demands or digging in her heels or is unpredictable then it won't matte if she uses mediation or the Ls.
