Divorce because I betrayed her trust - PART 6

[DaB35]

LH - thanks, good point.

I feel torn with this to be honest.

One hand - yes I agree, I've been fired as a husband. She doesn't want - rather, feels she doesn't want - me in her life anymore in that capacit: someone to help her with things, answer her questions, support her etc.
She feels that the only way to cope with everything is to blow up the M and D me.
She isn't telling me she misses me (or she does miss me, but isn't admitting it to anyone - I know, no mind-reading!!).

Other hand - this woman means so much to me. Despite all her flaws, I loved her immensely, and genuinely. Despite the hurt I inflicted on her, I felt we could have worked on the R, especially since my IC only took six months to get through. Effectively ignoring her at Christmas feels like I don't care about her any more, when actually I'm not fully detached yet and do care about her still.
But then, is this the point? Is this true DBing - would she be expecting me to get her a gift, so therefore me not giving her anything will wrongfoot her somewhat?

Will me not doing anything give ammo to her sister and friends saying, "well he clearly doesn't care about you otherwise he'd have at least got you something."?

Will me giving her something make them think, "He doesn't get it yet does he? What a moron!"

Will be tough not seeing W on Xmas morning, and not even getting a text from her. It's going to be hard but I have my family, and meeting up with some friends over the holiday too, so should be nice at least.