Sometimes one spouse has to give 80% while the other can only give 20%.
This is an acute phase. You need to focus on your healing. And focusing on your healing shows her that you want to go back to being the active loving husband you were. If just sink into a depression, that probably where things will go south.
Right now it’s ok if you can’t go out and have fun and have sex and all of that. You shouldn’t worry about her straying because of that right after surgery.
So first, stop thinking you are a bummed out useless grinch. And instead think of yourself as a strong guy on the road to healing.
If you can pay the bills, continue to do that. Take the time to talk to her, joke around, talk about her day. Rub her feet. Kiss her. Compliment her.
But your focus should be on getting better. And I hope you do begin to feel some relief soon.
