Battling Forward Part2

[Core]

Jac and LH, thanks for the input! I've read up a bit on both your sitchs, just amazing how much can be similar in all of these WW WAS occurrences.

My W like many others here is facing demons of her past and I seem to take the blame or brunt of it. Demons never faced through counseling. As is stands for now, she actually seems happy. She's been upbeat, playing with the kids more, getting more done around the house and getting out more. Happy cause our M is over, happy cause she faced her past or happy cause of OM, who knows. Just repeating to myself here that, that doesnt matter at this point but its better than the cold tension of the first 1.5 months.

What does bother me and where I'm still struggling is cake eating. Today we talked about S1s, 1st bday. I didnt want to invite some of her friends H's over whom are siding with the D. She thought it was weird I didnt want them over. These same people have stopped inviting me out...why would I want them around.... I Didn't say that though. I felt we'd get in to an R talk. So were going to have a normal bday, for S1. Also, she twice brought up things to do after xmas in our house for the kids. We both seem stubborn as F. Neither one of us wants to be the one to leave the house. Still no new talks on mediation. I think I said it before and similar to Chaz's sitch, I dont want to end up as friends or roommates. After several days thinking of my sitch, I'm no closer on how to proceed with limbo. Live in the same house for how long here? If she really did stop talking to OM then is it really cake eating or is it in my favor? It's in my kids favor for the time being but I wonder in the long run if one of us were removed from the house, if it would be a wake up call. Either way financially and logistically, neither of us can really be removed from the house.