Pax, it is normal and rational to want to look at these from a point of fairness and balance. He will never be able to do this. Whatever the trial costs, it does not matter. Your guy cannot mediate. You will never settle with him.
Judges split babies. You need to up your request to end up where you should be. I'm delighted his attorney acknowledged the bird feeder and copper windmill are community property, which hasn't been resolved. Guess what, so is everything you "left" behind in the house. Add it all up, all of it on a spreadsheet and be ready to submit it at court. I bet your lawyer could send a demand to inspect the premises (a flavor of a request for production) so you can go and make a list and take pics. Do you want the stuff? No, do you want an offset for the value of the stuff-- YES! Go after half of every single thing he has, because he is going to do the same to you and more.
Why did he take down the bird feeder? Because were your positions reversed he would have taken it, so he expects that you would do the same. Pettiness, yes. But again, this says who he is as a person. Not you. Laugh about it, move on.
I'll wager you may have the same problem with the judge when it comes to the dog. Mediators are there for petty squabbles. That he wouldn't undertake that suggests that the court might not either (not that I'm implying this is a petty squabble, but it speaks volumes that he thought he was above it). Be ready. Emotionally prepare yourself that the dog could be awarded to either of you, or split time with no guidance (which is my biggest concern for you).
I would tell him one more time, I don't have your beanie, I have not seen it. Do not waste my time with it again.
No one questions why you didn't take the stuff. We all survived a tsunami and had to fight to survive. Remember though, at the end of the day, it is just stuff. Memories and relationships are the things that matter. While I hope you get your stuff, try not to put too much of yourself in an outcome you can't control.
Take some time now to relax and move past this part. Get ready by making yourself emotionally tough. Get back in the gym, whatever makes you feel like a warrior.
