MLC or Exit Afffair?

[Core]

My therapist also said similar things, all counter to DB rules. "Talk to W, tell her how you feel about her and the marriage, and that you want her to end her chats with OM. Tell her you want answers on where your relationship is going". My heart agreed with the counselor and a coworker who went through a similar sitch. The next relationship talk that my wife brought up, I let her know I cared, knew about OM, and knew we could work this out. She got mad, asked when I'm ready to start mediation and left. It definitely pushed her. She now takes the kids out without telling me. The long term consequence I dont know, not too much seems changed however it does feel like I undid progress if I made any. On the other end, it felt great getting it all out there one last time.

You know your spouse and sitch better than any of us. Different methods work for different people. I do believe the vets are right in that LBS in most sitchs should abide by the rules.