Everyone else has said what I am thinking already but my main question is: why are you still snooping her messages? She is obviously upset and agitated and knows you are snooping somehow but hasn't cottoned onto your method. This is an invasion of privacy and a control tactic. Change the passwords, remove access to her accounts or devices, whatever it takes to do the right thing because you obviously can't control yourself. You know this is wrong and it's only hurting you and hurting your chances of genuine reconciliation. Please just stop.
