Battling Forward Part2

[Core]

Mario, if you see this, I'd love to hear more about your sitch, what it was, how you got through it.

Steve, I dont think I wanted to face it but you're right, my sitch is not looking like one of the short term ones. I held out hope, the one in my extended families past was quick and there were no threats of divorce, just the EA. Please keep calling me out on my control when you see it. I'm recognizing it more often the more I hear it.

Tonight for the first time since having kids, W has taken them out at night without letting me know they are going out, where and when they'll be back. My pursuit days ago does seem to have pushed further. Not sure if I'll see them tonight. Guess its time to get used to this. I went to counseling and took the rest of the night to relax and watch a movie. Didnt help as it was full of plenty of loss, plenty of W's caring for and loving their H's. Mine wants me out of the tribe and all wants all my resources or so I was told. She's doing little things around the house for me but I think now its out of guilt. Whatever it is, I cant control it, dont need to over think it and its definitely not a sign of reconciling. I hope not but it seems I'm on course for the big D, nothing slowing it down except the panther waiting to pounce at the perfect time to get its kill. I dont know why she hasn't scheduled mediation. I miss my kids. All this GALing is taking away so much bonding time. I'm likely to lose 50 percent of their time as it is, hard to sacrifice the little left now as a complete family.