Also in terms of the MR in past times (married 14 years), H used to shower me with affection, flowers, cards. He would call me beautiful. It all seems like it was fake now although maybe he meant it at the time. Just four months ago, he was doing these things.
After the BD, I did all the wrong things. I sent him articles about rough patches in marriage, asked him to consider staying for the kids' sake, pleaded, etc. He says he just needs me to free him. He says he cannot be the husband I deserve. I have told him that he can, that we just need help. After that he began staying out all night as opposed to coming in at 3 am or 4 am. I felt like he was either trying to punish me or trying to push me to agree to a divorce in a very passive aggressive way. Of course I think he is with an OW. The first few times he claimed he was staying at a male friend's house after having drinks. Then he stopped even trying to explain and just asked me to free him. Now I have no idea when he will be going out or coming in. He goes as he pleases.
Last edited by HesAble; 12/12/1903:22 PM.
H and Me - Both 45; S13 and D9 BD - 11/2019 Married 14 years; Together 20 years
