When it comes to advice here it seems for me that a majority of the time at least the forum is right. The first few months of me posting here, I was nowhere near convinced the recommendations here were the right things to do. I had many reasons but the one that made me post skeptic was that there must be cultural differences. I live in Sweden, surely the mentality and behavior canīt be the same here as in USA.
But every time I went with my intuition it drew her farther away. And every time I listened to the advice here, my W would react almost exactly as predicted. How I wish now that I had listened to the vets. If I knew then what I know now, my situation could perhaps have been different. But I donīt care if itīs too late now, the advice Iīve been given while here has changed me completely as a person. Iīm so enjoying being Ben 2.0 in all my relationships now.
I also lied to myself. I remember posting a few months ago that I couldnīt find ways to GAL because I have the dog to take care of. Now that W moved out, I have tons of things planned all the time. Friends coming over, going to get massages, going on trips etc etc. The truth, I see now, was that I didnīt really want to GAL, I wanted to be near my W when she was home.
Just an example of how we think we ware detaching but the reality is that we tend to hold on to that rope for a long time.
Me: 38 Stbxw: 35 No kids Mini bd: February 6, 2019 ONS confirmed Sept 7, 2019 Told her to move out: September 8, 2019 W moved out: September 28, 2019 Divorce filed by me: September 23, 2019
