Do you want to sell the house? Do you want to continue going to counseling? Will pushing D forward help you or hurt you? Do you even want to push D forward?
There are always options, but you have to decide what you want first -
Do you want to sell the house?
I want a fair financial situation. I am indifferent about the house. I talk about selling the house b/c I think my W will not be able to afford the mortgage once we have a fair financial situation.
Do you want to continue going to counseling?
Hmmm... No. I want to go to mediation. However I worry my W may regress if we stop counseling.
Will pushing D forward help you or hurt you?
It will help me be on more stable footing financially. And I will feel more secure having a legal parenting plan in place.
It will hurt me in the sense my W will feel I wanted it. It will feel final. It's not ultimately what I want, although I feel I need to face reality here.
Do you even want to push D forward?
I still wish we could work on the MR. But given my current circumstances, waiting in limbo is not healthy for me or my kids. I guess that's my point here... I'd like to change the circumstances so that I could wait. As it stands, we are living this pseudo-D'd lifestyle which is not really a D because I am financially supporting the whole thing (and having less parenting time with my kids than I want).
~~~
What I really want to do is communicate to my W that:
- I don't want a D. I want to work on the MR. - She has shown zero willingness to work on the MR throughout our 6 month separation, going to C, etc. - In the meantime, I need to protect myself financially and as a parent. I see no option other than D (or legal S, although I consider that equivalent).
I know DB would suggest I pare that down. And ultimately I don't think it matters if I communicate any of the above. It's just how I feel.
