Down, but not out ..... yet.

[Dawn70]

My heart hurts for you, G. It really does. I wish you could find everything it is that you want/need to make you happy because you certainly deserve it. I know you are busy between work and little G, but I still think putting yourself out there with hobbies and things is a way to go to meet people: both women and men. Yeah, doing things alone [censored]! It just does. And, it is hard when you are single and all your friends or married (or vice versa for some people), but you live in a well-populated area so there HAS to be some way to meet others and make friends.

I think it was kml who suggested NOT making little G think that she has to have a man to plan big milestones for her and to plan something for yourself. What about your friends? I mean, I know you say you are alone, but didn't you just go to Florida for a good friend's wedding recently? You obviously have friends who you are close enough to to spend money and travel to be part of their special day, so reach out to them and say hey, let's plan something for my 40th because it is going to be EPIC. I get that you want someone special to share these things with. You want to be a part of a couple. I totally understand. But just because you aren't and your friends are, doesn't mean that they can't celebrate your milestones with you.

Here's my little secret for you, though....it doesn't matter. And, others may disagree with me. I'll be 50 in January. I know Sparky has bought tickets to something for me and I have no idea what, though I have a good idea, but I'm trying not to spoil his surprise. Anyway, I'm the planner in our family because I'm a bit of a control freak (ok a whole lot of a control freak, but I digress), but I'm trying to be chill about this whole 50 thing because in all reality it is just another birthday. I'm not saying 40 isn't a big deal, because it most definitely is, but I can't honestly even tell you right this minute what I did for my 40th. I was married to my XH when I turned 40 and he was SO not a planner, so if we did anything, it wasn't anything big or that required a lot of planning. I seem to recall him inviting my entire family to our town and us going to my favorite restaurant in town to eat. The one specific thing I do remember is that the girls made me a cake and they worked very hard on it and it was super cute. Other than that, couldn't really tell you who was there, what we had/did/etc. It is a big deal, don't get me wrong, but 5 years from now...10 years from now....even farther into the future, will it really even matter that you planned it or reached out to your friends to help you or will it just matter that you got to have fun on your big, special day with some people who are special to you?