Divorce and Acceptance Part 4

[Pax_luv]

Thanks again, Own! Ahh yes, stockdale paradox. I just had this conversation with my mother last night. Basically, i think I’m burnt out and exhausted. From all of it. I’ve been hyper vigilant for far too long. It feels like like I’m opening Pandora’s box again and I have ptsd from last time. I’m just not looking forward to this, but will remain strong.

Oh and the weight thing... I’m on the lean/normal/optimal side of the BMI scale... so I’m healthy.... but I’m so psychologically messed up right now- I care what people think about me...

I’m like... can’t I just BE for a bit..... stop judging me everybody. I don’t feel good about myself, but everyone expects me to show up a certain way. Aka I care about others approval too much and I’m trying to grow beyond that.