ToSmile, is your goal to reconcile? If so, you may want to deescalate not escalate.

Threatening to D her for adultery. Threatening to tell the kids about her adultery. None of that will get you where you want to be.

You handled the draft papers perfectly: "Send them over I will have my lawyer look them over." Perfect! But then leave it at that. Even if she comes back with something else.

And guess what? At least in my state, an EA is not considered infidelity. It [censored] but most states have not caught up to the modern world. Or they don't care. Likely the last one. Since most states have moved to no-fault divorces. Which means she could get ridden more than Seattle Slew and it wouldn't matter in the D proceedings.

And it doesn't even help with custody. Judges usually take the attitude that "okay, so you proved she likes sex. That doesn't mean she isn't a good mother." So your righteous indignation over her actions that led to your sitch probably will not matter.

What does matter? How worked up she can still get you over this stuff. How is your detachment coming along?

M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018