H texted yesterday saying he is staying in town until our MC appointment and asked a million questions about the dogs, but said nothing about hanging out or seeing me. This is frustrating. I did end up telling him about the phone bill via text since he will have time to do whatever he needs to do tomorrow. I got some sob story (again) about money, before I said this. I said that his financial decisions are his choice, and no one made those choices but him, and that he also made choices for me financially by leaving, and that I am not willing to continue to pay his bills during this time. He said OK and I am taking his phone off of my bill today. He has a work phone, so not supremely detrimental to him.
I have spent all weekend angry instead of sad and haven't cried anymore. I am nervous about being angry about this because I don't want to say something I regret, but also stuff is definitely stewing. I have IC tonight. One of H's bosses is one of my close friends (this is how we met and he's actually who married us). He's in a strange position in all of this, but I do know he spoke to H yesterday about how everyone (including a bunch of people at work) is in limbo and how he needs to decide something, even if it is him being 100% sure that he isn't sure what he wants. I don't know how fruitful this conversation was. H did mention MC twice yesterday in our convo re the dogs.
This morning I did text saying I wasn't certain about going to MC right now, as I don't feel he cares about what I have to say/my feelings, and that his actions (or lackthereof) have spoken more than anything he can say in counseling, but I did say I am still willing to go and that I do have things to say and want to listen to him, too. I am frustrated at myself because every time I have texted him yesterday and this morning I have regretted it. Fortunately I will be busy at work for the next 3 days with a big meeting, and have IC tonight.
How patient should I be? Part of me wants to ask for the house key back, since he doesn't live nor stay here, and also want him to move the rest of his stuff out if he's so done. When I felt this way last week, I would be overcome with the want to work it out, but now I just feel mad/impatient and have felt that way for a few days. I am trying to remember the stuff we talked about to be more patient, but I really feel taken advantage of. Not that he cares about my feelings in this anyhow.
