[Ready2Change]

You need to focus on your behavior. Change the way you behave. Behave in ways that makes your woman FEEL good. This is a big task. I lump all the changes into "Alpha Male"

#1) Do not attempt to control her. Set her free to make decisions.
#2) Listen and Validate. STFU and listen. Do not share your opinions. When you want to say something STFU.
#3) Face your Fear. Prepare for the worse and hope and pray for the best.

Read this post and burn coaches words into your head. Then behave like he says:
https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2846984

So, do I stop setting up dates?

Set up things YOU want to do. Test the waters.

H:"W, I will be going to see (band name) this friday. Would you like to join me?"

If she says yes:

H:"OK. I will see if so and so will watch the kids"

If she says no:

H:"OK." walk away and keep doing things"

React emotionally the same with either chioce she makes.

Ones that are already set, do I cancel them?

No. Go out and project confidence. Treat her different. Be different.

Do I stop spending as much time with her?

Treat her like a cat. Let her come to you. Be busy taking care of things.

Engaging in nightly conversations?

If she comes to you. End the convos first. She talks. You listen and validate.