You are the only that can determine when you've had enough and need to file. You have a necessary need to file because of the financial situation. As for the ow, she's nothing more than a band aid to his issues. I do understand how you feel about the ow and what your h has and is continuing to do.
When making decisions, please make those decisions from a place of calm and not when you are angry and/or hurt. It is important that you now look at this relationship as a business deal that has soured.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
