It's easier to blame the OP, your mate, whoever. I had my faults in the break down of our M, just as my H did. We didn't know how to communicate our pain, yet were looking to each other to fix it. I was emotionally shut down, turned off from my H. I was so unhappy that in my mind I thought if H had an A, that would be the reason I needed to get out of the hell that I was in, the depression, the deadness of my feelings for H..our M. then it happened and my oh my it was nothing like I expected and I didn't do the expected--D my H. I wanted our M more than I wanted anything else. I even "considered" having an A myself, but didn't follow through with it. A man that worked in my dept. said good morning to me every day with a genuine smile. He was married and had no clue I was interested or my thoughts about him...as we never talked.
H leaving was the boot in the butt that I needed to take a good look at myself and change myself, change my life...and it worked. And, believe it or not, I am thankful and even thanked my H at one point.
Here I am today a better person, a kinder, happier person. I love my H more than I thought possible--unconditionally and we're struggling to put our M back together.
I don't know why I put this all here, but KK I loved your honesty and thank you for sharing.
