A little more background. She had a job that she hated and had wanted to quit for over a year and she has a serious family health situation that has no resolution in sight. As of May I could see that we were trending in a bad direction as we weren't going on date nights, we weren't working on our marriage, we weren't going to counseling and I could feel the distance growing between us. In July she was miserable. Working horrible hours for a horrible boss and her family was a nightmare. We continued to get more distant.

Then we had a bad two-week run. I put pressure on her for sex one night and she said no. She had a birthday that was challenging, just getting older - but I did a good job planning gifts around it and she had a nice day. I went away for business and when I came back we had a very busy weekend. On Saturday I asked her if I could go work out and she said I could. I got home and asked if I could trim the lawn before we went to a neighbors BBQ and she said "Fine."

I offered to help her in the kitchen instead and she said: "No, go trim the lawn." She was pissed because she didn't think I would have time to trim the lawn and get ready for the party on time. She rushed to leave with the kids before I was ready, but it didn't take me that long and so I was right on time but she was pissed and didn't talk to me the rest of the night.

On Sunday of the weekend, she and my son had a conversation about his video game usage and I made a joke about it - she felt undermined and went to our room and locked the door crying.

Then on Sunday night, she started to light me up. She said that I was being selfish because she had the kids all week and I went to work out in the middle of the afternoon on Saturday. She said that was selfish in trimming the lawn. She said that I undermined her in front of our son, and I cracked. I told her that she should focus on herself sometimes and do what she needed to do to be happy.

We went to sleep, didn't makeup. Went through the week and on the following Saturday she sat me down to tell me she was done. We had an expensive vacation planned for her birthday with friends that she canceled as well, prepaid for.

Since then, she decided she wasn't going to move out and that she wanted more space at home. She says she doesn't want to work on the marriage. But she began saying she loved me at night again and she began giving me a kiss at night when we good to bed and she gives me a hug and kiss when I leave in the morning, which wasn't happening before. We went through a week or two where she would hold my hand as we fell asleep, but that's not allowed or happening any longer.

During this stretch, she finally quit her job and is trying to transition to something she would be happier doing. I supported her through that.