Friends: Season 3--Expanding and thriving

[Meredith]

Hola ocean buddies! Shark number two, reporting in! Yes, fish sober…

It has been a busy week around these parts, so I haven’t had a lot of posting time. It seems that the conversation was pretty sustained though!

For the OW/OM thing, like Pam, I’d just like to add that their value system isn’t quite at skewed as we like to think. They do not see the marriage, the spouse at home, and that the rip tide that is happening as a result of the affair. At worst, they can be accused of behaving selfishly by trying to pull our spouse into their life.

But they didn’t kidnap these men or women, either. I read once that OM/OW should receive 50% of the blame. To me, that is ridiculous. I’d give them maybe 5% on a good day. Our spouses are the ones who made the conscious choice to meet their needs outside of their marriage. I reiterate, if it hadn’t been this OW/OM, it would have been another. ‘Nough said. The more we focus on the symptom, the less we do about the problem. And I speak from the experience of someone who envisioned the nasty things I would say to this OW, the torture I’d love to put her through, the actions I could take to make her loose her job, etc, etc, etc. And at the end of the day? I’d have accomplished nothing. I see that now.

Bets…I truly admire you for your attitude about this. I know that you are truly ready to accept any outcome. I have been also; I just hope for your sake that you don’t receive another ‘I don’t know’. Have you asked him for a reasonable time frame in when you expect his answer? We’re all here for you, which of course you know!