I agree w/OwnIt. Your h has been stuck for a long time and he sees that you and your sons are moving on w/o him and are living a nice and happy lifestyle. He's a miserable man who can't even get out of his own way because he doesn't know how to go about it. He is still in the anger and blame game mode.
You can't fix him because you didn't break him. Yes, it makes you sad to see that he's not looking to the future, but that is not your fault. He is the only way that can fix himself. All you can do is get out of his way and allow him to fight w/himself and one day, he just might hit that brick wall very hard and come to realize all that he has lost. Until then, live your life to the fullest and keep the focus on you and your sons.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
