Down, but not out ..... yet.

[AndrewP]

ALL of my relationships that have gone anywhere, going back to my late teens were initiated by the woman. Generally speaking, they all went well.

I know that I absolutely don't speak for most of the guys here, but I find a woman who is interested in me even prior to me being interested in her, very attractive. These relationships have also all started out as casual acquaintances / encounters and not me being "on the hunt". On the other hand, all of these women are people who I also found attractive / intriguing. There have been a small number who have hinted that they would be interested in me who I don't find all that interesting or who have what is in my mind a significant flaw like a drinking issue who I remain friendly with but am not receptive to otherwise.

Further to what JuJuB has said, one of the key differences with OLD vs meeting organically is that there is no pussy-footing (or so I presume) about intentions. It's right there on your profile - "looking for a relationship" or "looking to date but nothing serious". You have to - again I presume - take those statements at face value. B for example, the only person I connected to via OLD even though we'd met in person some time previously, had "looking for someone to marry" on her's. This is why it was no surprise that after a few dates that we were exploring what a future might look like.

Personally (again) I wouldn't be wasting my time on someone who said that they were just was looking for casual encounters. I've lots of friends already of both genders.

Once the initial interest has been established, I like to think that I'm an engaged person, taking an active interest in the person, making an effort to reach out and connect, initiating or responding warmly. If that's not reciprocated as was the case last fall with CL, then I back away.

Just my 2 cents.