Trying to do the right thing...

[Rita]

Oh my gosh, OC Hope, your story makes my h3ll look like a cake walk! The only good thing about your story is that you can be very clear it's not you. There is no need for any confusion in your story!

Your situation is so very difficult.

I wanted to ask if you have been to AA or NA meetings yourself, the ones for family of addicts. I think it would be really helpful to hear their take and they might have the best insight and ideas based on years of experience.

But with no experience at all in the best way to deal with someone as severely addicted as your wife, if you want to keep her away from your kids but also keep her off the street and fulfill your vows as best as you can, could you afford a really tiny apartment or even a room somewhere in your town? Maybe make sure that she understands you will do it for six months and by then she needs to have a job and be paying her own way?

Also make sure that you are documenting all of this and keep police records, etc. I didn't read your sitch but you should get a formal custody arrangement in place while she is not caring about anything, she might make it too hard for you if she starts getting angry with you, and clearly you need to protect your kids. Maybe you can make the apartment contingent on her signing it.

((((OC Hope))))) You are carrying a heavy cross. Your love for your kids will get you all through this!