What a wild couple of years. Thinking back i really wish I had listened to more people on this forum...especially Sandi2. Probably would have saved me a lot of aggravation, stress and overall turmoil. When I reflect back, I think it was hard to process that my wife had changed, didn’t love or respect me, and could care less of how I end up! When you choose to marry somebody you are making a life together, envisioning being with that person until the end. To discover that she’s been having an affair for “god knows how long” and doesn’t show any sense of remorse when she’s caught is like being beaten and tortured! Your entire fabric is ripped from your reality and sets you off on an emotional roller coaster.
I feel like I’ve seen enough from my wife to know that she is set in her way, dangerous, and would have no problem destroying me if I get in her way! For so long, I always thought of her thru the lense of when we were in love. Sweet girl with a kind heart and love for family and friends. Now I look at her and I see nothing but anger and resentment combined with a desire to act like a teen age girl again. So where do I go from here?
No long to I get caught up in worrying about her or what she does. I’m focusing on me. But with that said, I still have to be able to negotiate a divorce and occasionally interact with her concerning my children’s affairs! I guess I need help with that. How do I control my emotions when she provokes me with comments or actions? I know I need to take the emotions out of this and maintain a steady, calculated approach. It’s not easy when someone has hurt you like you have never been hurt before!!!
