Confused and Lost II

[KristinG]

Hey guys! Thought I would give a quick update. I took a few days off from the forums to clear my head and stop spinning. Friday was a bad day - thank you all so much for your words of encouragement and advice. WW could tell that I was having a hard day and knew it was about our sitch. I went off the radar and just spent some time with some self care that night. The rest of the weekend my emotions were much more balanced. I got a lot accomplished with work and it always feels good to get caught up.

There's such a thing as forbidden fruit theory with affairs. Once they are addicted, the more you try to stop them, the more they want it. At this point, aside from them being happily ever after, what else worse can happen?

THIS! I wish there was more information out there for people to realize that it's not just an "oops" moment in many of the cases with affairs. The wayward is 100% addicted and that will never change unless the OW/OM ends it, or until they hit rock bottom.

R2C - I am facing those fears daily my friend. Thank you for being a strong voice in keeping me grounded. I'm still not doing full NC, but I am protecting myself and evolving. Maybe I'll wake up one day and I'll be ready and know that I can follow through.

U,

You are absolutely right. Friday I couldn't stop the obsessive thoughts and focus on her. I (finally) know that reacting off of those emotions and making rash decisions aren't the way to push through them. Previously, with emotions that intense I would have pushed her away only to allow her back in. I kept to myself and persevered. I didn't let them get the best of me and I didn't make a decision only to make myself look weak. Just like with R2C, if those emotions persist long enough I'm sure that my choices will reflect a need to go full NC.

Cali & May,

I feel like you two gals are true gems! It's been such a blessing to have both of your incites and amazing encouragement throughout everything. I'll catch up with both of ya'll on your threads!

Happy Turkey Week! I'm super thankful to have found this group.

KG