I think things are going well. I finally asked H if he still wanted to convert the separation agreement to a D, and he said he wanted to keep the separation agreement. This is definitely a step in the right direction, but I’m not sure of the logic behind his decision. We seem to be getting closer, despite a complete lack of intimacy. He actually loitered at my house for over an hour last night after coming to get the kids. He said the kids wanted him to stay.
I’m still working on validation, and working on myself. I’ve completely changed my look and wardrobe, been working out a lot, am keeping my house spotless, etc. I suppose it’s working, but the one thing that kills me is his wedding band. His is tattooed on, and he’s currently in the process of getting it lasered off. I’m trying to ignore this, but it just feels like he’s trying to erase me. I asked him about it at one point, and he just made the comment that I’m not wearing my ring. I took it off because I had zero hope after BD—I wasn’t expecting things to get better. I’ve considered putting my ring back on, but I actually feel like that would be a “push” behavior at this point.
