The last time he spewed at me, he acted very injured that I never make small talk with him, and said that makes me mean and cold.
Ummm....if he says such a thing again, I would remind him that what is REALLY mean and cold is abandoning your wife and child.
Interesting about his abandonment by his parents. Yes, I think most young adults just starting out might feel abandoned in such a situation. And if he'd been generally a nicer husband before his crisis, I would think perhaps he was just recreating his childhood trauma. BUT - since he's shown evidence of serious issues for a very long time - it's also possible that his parents sold the house and took off so that he couldn't move back home with them.
(A former athlete has been sentenced for rape charges in my city - my boyfriend knew his famous father and wondered why the dad had moved into a one bedroom apartment years ago - suspicion is it was to keep his son from moving back in.)
Generally, it's a good idea to keep to the high road. Be polite but distant.
