I'm going to paint what is hopefully a clearer picture. I saw you in pain, bballer1, and see that you aren't throwing in the towel yet and you want to save this.

Your W sees this too, plus she sees your pursuit, your R talks, sees that you are around her still. I think she sees you as still on the hook. The OM is clearly still on the hook. She is thinking emotionally, not logically. Right now she has two worlds going on and is getting what she wants from both of those, regardless of who she hurts to get them. Your pain is stopping you from making clear, thoughtful decsions. That's why you need to detach.

I see it as a major positive that your W doesn't want to divorce as well as y'alls religious background and small town life. Now, it's time for her to see your back walking away from her and wonder if that is really what she wants. Your kids are old enough, I think you should not be home when she is. Don't put yourself in a position to have a convo with her about anything. I mean really, what do you NEED to talk to her about? Get out of the house in the evening too, let her wonder what you're up to. Be a man of action and quit being so wordy and needy with her. Quit rehashing all the BS she has put you through. Let her see this happen and her tune may change. Or maybe she realizes she wants a divorce after all. I don't think you can keep going the way you have been. Time for a change my friend!

Please think about updating your signature to reflect your sitch too!


H 34
W 29
BD 3/12/18
Divorce Busted Spring 19

It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.