If it helps... my kids aren’t traumatized either. Are they happy their parents split up? Of course not. But there is a difference between being unhappy and being traumatized. There was an adjustment period, for sure, but now that we are through it and they know that both their parents are okay (they take their cues from you btw) and they are used to the new routine, they are doing well.
I was a mess last year at this time and it pains me to think about how that affected them. It took months for my son to not closely scan my face to make sure I hadn’t been crying...and he often accused me of crying when I hadn’t been. I am much better now and he has stopped checking. He knows I am good and isn’t worried any longer.
Unfortunately....divorce is all too common in today’s society. This is a curse (kids who live with both parents do better statistically) and a blessing (children of divorce have plenty of friends who are in the same boat). I still hate that my kids have two homes and they do not get to grow up in an intact family the way I did... I always will. But I have accepted it and I know that now that I have, my kids are better off.
