Quote: He initiates all calls. Should I just start to say so how was your day and take it from there.
That sounds good. Don't cut your calls off before you have a chance to have some sort of convo. I don't think I ever followed this rule very well. LOL What does he talk about when he calls? I did lots of just listening. H wound up calling me a couple of times when he was upset, but wouldn't admit it. I just asked him if he wanted to talk, and eventually he just spilled what was on his mind.
Quote: How do I find balance?
You won't, not for a long time. H and I still go up and down, but it's evening out. Every time you and your H spend time together, he's going to pull back for some time afterwards. Just expect it, and find something else to do in that time.
At some point, you need to spend time together, a little bit at a time, to rebuild your M. It sounds like--and I may be wrong here!--that you've pulled way, way back and are waiting to see if he will come around. I would try something small, and non-R. Maybe a little longer phone conversation. Ask about his day, or something like that. Get him something to drink the next time he is showing your S how to mow. That sort of thing. And then see how he responds.
I don't think I ever followed this rule very well. LOL What does he talk about when he calls? I did lots of just listening. H wound up calling me a couple of times when he was upset, but wouldn't admit it. I just asked him if he wanted to talk, and eventually he just spilled what was on his mind. 
