Hi nitaf....just reading through your thread here to catch up.
I don't know about every body else's WAS, but mine sure as heck let me know that EVERYTHING was ALL my fault....for a long time I heard that.
I also found that ONLY when I mirrored/validated his perceptions did he begin to rethink that....I swear it's still almost funny to think back to how he responded when I started just doing that instead of standing up for myself. It really was like watching the air going out of a balloon.
In response to your last question, I'd have to say I'm white w/some native american, brings up some interesting questions about the influences of cultural variables, doesnt it? I've often thought of that from the standpoint of ethnicity and religion and even rural/urban locals. Of course I can easily confuse even myself, so I guess it just points out how important it is to carefully consider what we do in light of our individual sitch's!
