What do you usually do when your H says these things? Do you argue? Or try to rationalize? Have you tried just agreeing with him. The first time I did that, my H quit pretty quickly. The second time, he said, "Well...maybe it's not all your fault..." And after that he would say, "I know you did this, and it sucked, but that's okay, because I also know why you did it..." Anyway, if you quit putting up resistance, it might confuse him into taking a different stance.
The first time I did that, my H quit pretty quickly. The second time, he said, "Well...maybe it's not all your fault..." And after that he would say, "I know you did this, and it sucked, but that's okay, because I also know why you did it..." Anyway, if you quit putting up resistance, it might confuse him into taking a different stance. 
