I practised validating at work today. A colleague suddenly burst into tears with the amount of work she has - seems to be quite unrealistic. I said things like, "I can see how overwhelming that much work would be" or "it sounds like it would be difficult to plan everything when you work part-time but in a managerial role". She seemed to calm down a bit and appeared to compose herself.
Yes! That's awesome! Validation is a great tool to use with coworkers and clients, your kids, friends, anyone you cross paths with really. I've validated total strangers in line at the grocery store. Even as much as I talk about validation I STILL catch myself going into fix-it mode sometimes, man old habits are soooo hard to break.
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She has not chased it though which surprises me, as it's been nearly 2 weeks since she brought it up first. There is no animosity at present, just complete NC unless absolutely necessary (e.g. yesterday she asked me to pay the window cleaner as they'd come round last week when nobody was in the house - simple business-like polite texts from me).
Sooo, you've been DB'ing, validating, giving her time and space, haven't even seen her in 2 months. And she has suddenly dropped pushing for a speedy D. Hmmmm, could it be that you've effectively removed the pressure from her?
