Shame and devastation 3

[DaB35]

Hi J

I think it's good you're going to 180 on the smoking and drinking.

Cold turkey can be hard but often the best way to overcome something. For me it was porn addiction that harmed my R and M. I went cold turkey and started IC simultaneously. I remember 2 months or so in, my W asked, "So you've not had any relapses?" And I could honestly say "Nope." very confidently. She looked rather annoyed!
Now 6 months later I'm 'free' of it. Doesn't really enter my head, because over time I've identified and found things to replace it with; good positive things that help with overall self-esteem and PMA.

I think if you 180 on a few major things, and consistently keep that up, it'll get noticed by lots of people. Don't do it just to get W's attention. Do it to better yourself, and then other friends will notice first. It'll be gradual ("Hey, you are looking very well these days") and then it'll eventually snowball.