IMO your IC is giving you bad advice. That’s more for normal marriages not when it’s in crisis.
^^^I agree with LH on this. Spilling your guts to W right now liable to be counterproductive. If you need someone to talk to, find a friend you can trust. It is important to be able to talk these things out sometimes, particularly when you are spinning, but when you have a WAW or WW, your spouse is typically not the best person. I was lucky enough to have a very good friend who was going through a very similar ordeal with his own WW, and being able to talk frankly about evrything that was going on was invaluable for my own mental well being. Hopefully you have such a friend (doesn't have to be someone also experiencing marital discord, just someone you know you can trust.)
H53/W51, R-ing 4/'18
"Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires"-Sg.of Sg 2:7
"So oftentimes it happens,that we live our lives in chains, & we never even know we have the key"-Eagles III 1:3
