W my life. I wish......... no...... you know what I’m gonna say it...... I wish I would have never married you, I wish I would have never had given birth to our son. I wish I had graduated high school and moved far away....
Great job staying strong!!
How about you give your W her wishes?? Just thinking out loud here. I AM NOT SAYING DO THIS.
Can you care for your S without her? What if she just up and left, would you be able to care for him alone? Can you give her a "Vacation" from you and son? Give her a real chance to miss what she has?
Anyway, congrats on the job. I guess we will have to pass on that beer. I plan on Deer hunting south east CO next weekend (Possibly Thursday and Friday as well).
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Here’s what’s awesome. As she said those words this morning they had NO effect on me. I just didn’t say anything back. I felt great afterwards.
Here is a catch. I’m curious of your guys opinion
She took a nosedive when I told her about new job. She started scrambling to find a way to declare bankruptcy so she can separate herself from me. She doesn’t believe this job will work out. So when she found out I’m leaving behind a steady paycheck she is ready to leave. The people around me think she is just staying for the security. And I agree with them. So when I’m making 10k a month and she changes her tune and wants to work on M...... I’m not down with that
Advice. Cause I’m much more than a paycheck. And based on her comments last night it doesn’t make a difference if I die from cancer or not
Thoughts
She may be. And you just pulled that rug out from under her. My guess is that she doesn't mean what she is saying. She is angry and hurt and lashing out. Remember believe NOTHING...NOTHING, positive or negative, that she says.
Just go crush it at your new gig.
Originally Posted by Ready2Change
Originally Posted by ozman
W my life. I wish......... no...... you know what I’m gonna say it...... I wish I would have never married you, I wish I would have never had given birth to our son. I wish I had graduated high school and moved far away....
Great job staying strong!!
How about you give your W her wishes?? Just thinking out loud here. I AM NOT SAYING DO THIS.
Can you care for your S without her? What if she just up and left, would you be able to care for him alone? Can you give her a "Vacation" from you and son? Give her a real chance to miss what she has?
Anyway, congrats on the job. I guess we will have to pass on that beer. I plan on Deer hunting south east CO next weekend (Possibly Thursday and Friday as well).
I like this idea. Line up child care. Then sit her down and say "I understand you are unhappy. And that you do not want me, our S, or this family. So I have arranged for S to be cared for while I am at work. You are free to leave and start your new life.
Call her bluff.
R2C, good luck and be safe out there. I will be in the woods from the 14th-18th myself.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
I like this idea. Line up child care. Then sit her down and say "I understand you are unhappy. And that you do not want me, our S, or this family. So I have arranged for S to be cared for while I am at work. You are free to leave and start your new life.
Call her bluff.
She may not be bluffing. Either way, I think this shows strength. It shows that you really listened to her. You understand what she believes she needs to be happy. You are setting her free.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Thanks everybody. I’m very excited. I passed all the interviews. Squared things away with my old boss. And I start Monday. I’m on terminal leave so I have a few days to myself! Very excited!
So check it out
H you seem down this morning W I am H what’s wrong W my life. I wish......... no...... you know what I’m gonna say it...... I wish I would have never married you, I wish I would have never had given birth to our son. I wish I had graduated high school and moved far away....
This was after last night when she told me she basically didn’t care if I died from cancer
Anyways I’m in a great mood today. I gotta go buy some nice clothes for the new job and I’m looking forward to it
Oz,
I feel bad for you, that you had to hear that. I don't know how much she means it, but I know that's crazy to hear. Good on you for being strong and getting to this point of detachment. Best of luck in your new gig, you seem to be progressing well.
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
ozman, you're a better man than I am. If my W had told me that, I would have broken down. I hope I can react like you soon!
Some time ago, when I told my W love is more than a feeling, it's a choice ... she told me "I choose NOT to love you" and that completely broke me inside. I thought that was the worst thing you can tell somebody, but reading what was told to you gives me some perspective.
She just walked into the house 2 hrs late from work and tore into me for not having the house clean. HAHAHA. Like my first day of vacation and I’m the maid now?
I’m gonna ask her tonight if she would like to move out and leave me and E behind. You know. Since she regrets us so bad and all
Advice?
Augusto. Don’t worry my friend. I was an unmitigated disaster. Follow my thread back to the beginning. People have told me that I was one of the most desperate posters they have ever seen
I’m gonna ask her tonight if she would like to move out and leave me and E behind. You know. Since she regrets us so bad and all Advice?
Hi Ozman,
I love it, if you can stay positive, have childcare figured out, and are okay either way. Note how Steve's comment is positive, validating, and does not push her to go, stay, or make a choice on your timeline.
I'd probably avoid your question form, seeking a response. I'd also avoid "Since you regret us so bad and all" as it sounds bitter. I'd avoid this entirely if you'd be upset if she maintains the limbo. Woah--that's a lot of reservations! Any reason to do this tonight when you're still sore over the maid business?
