WMLC - Thoughts appreciated!

[Rita]

I just posted this on another thread but have had the same thought for you!

Just be careful about thinking that anything you do can change this. I see that you are often trying to calculate the effect of your actions. That will never work. You are doing a great job being kind to her and living life but you are still inside the mirrored box I was in for many years, where you secretly think that unlike all the stories you read here, you can figure out which of your actions will result in which of her actions. That is never going to be a consistent thing and will drive you insane. Believe me. Or skim through my threads from my early days! I do not regret anything I did, or most of it, because I am still trying to become who God wants me to be, and that doesn't always align perfectly with DB. But I do wish I had been able to let go of him more fully; I ended up waiting many years trying to be a good wife, until he became so evil that there was no way to hold on to him anymore. It is so clear to me now that all that I read here is right, that you have to let them go completely, and know that even a D does not mean the end forever, it's just the business side.

Also I don't think Sandy has been here for years.