...last night I had sex with W.... but just need some advice on how i should act moving forward.
Just keep making positive changes to your behavior. If something is working, keep doing it. If something is not working, stop and try something different.
Remember that her behavior is not the measurement stick. Your behavior is. Were you needy? NO.
You will be traveling down several parallel paths for a while.
From this point forward, your job is to protect the relationship, in a non-needy way. Old you did not know this. The new you does.
My current lady has worked in the service industry as a bar-tender. I had to be comfortable with her interacting with other men, even her flirting with them. I was very observant. Keeping an eye out for red flags. You are in a similar circumstance. Be very aware that other men want your wife. How you respond is important. Controlling behavior is unattractive. Protecting behavior is attractive.
When I was married, I was ignorant. I allowed W to have some close male friends. I am sure at least one of these was inappropriate.
Right now it is important for you to keep challenging your current beliefs. Read as much as you can.
If you have another opportunity to have sex with W, I strongly suggest that you have some new "tricks" that pleasantly surprise her. Start doing research now. You have been with her a long time. She needs some excitement. She needs to be surprised by the new you.
Last edited by DS9; 11/05/1910:37 PM.
Me: early 40's XW: nearly 50 T: 15 M: 5 BD: Jan 19 S:10 SS: 22 SD: 24
