Where is your MLCer 2-10 years into/or post crises

[tadpole1025]

Well, well well. This is a good one.

It has been 9 years since bomb.

Putting things simply by year:

06/10-Dr. puts her on hormones.
07/10-Joined dating site because a lot of her single friends at work were on them.
08/10-Starts EA with OM.
08/10-We celebrate 25 year anniversary.
10/10-Bomb drop. I never saw it coming.
12/10-Moved out on son's 16th birthday. Nice huh?

01/11-Says she wants a divorce.
05/11-Files for divorce.
10/11-Divorce is final.

06/12-She gets engaged.

05/13-She buys house with OM.
06/13-She marries OM.

2014-She tells sons that she doesn't understand why we can't be friends and wishes that I could just accept things and be civil.

2014 - 2019-I see her occasionally at family events. She tries to make small talk and we exchange pleasantries, but that's it. Still wants to be friends and wishes I would meet OM. (I still haven't met him. I was going to at a family get together, but he backed out at the last minute. Think he is afraid of me.)

2019-Son informs me that she sometimes talks to OM terribly and treats him bad.

2019-Son tells her that I want nothing to do with her. According to him, she is "flabbergasted and just beside herself" at this news.

She wants a "friend" relationship with me, but I can't. I just can't.

I rarely see her these days. I loved her deeply and really wish things were different, but I can't be friends with her. Friends don't do what she did.

Tad