The last straw

[Zip]

Been working hard at items on the repair list for the wedding. Not much change to report. Seems W is more than content in the relationship. No real conv taking place. She is overwhelmed w work into the eve. Been offering to bring or cook dinner and taken up on it more than not ( not new for me to do esp in past 3+ yrs) but little appreciation.

She acts like I am a friend and shows NO signs in moving from back BR. I see this as a roadblock in moving forward. She is very content and has no reason to change as she probably wanted this all along. I am stuck in a roommate situation. So with my patience being tried, I am not sure this is M is even salvageable and thinking I am stuck until the D27 wedding next June. Not sure it would be wise to make waves and my IC is saying wait until her work slows down after the first of the yr. prior to addressing any heavy conversation. She feels timing is crucial. I want some answers or at least some positive signs to stay hopeful.

She described herself as a Walk away wife in the past. Any specific thoughts on how to deal with this sitch. She has said she loves me but.... she feels she could never live up to the expectations I have for a wife regarding sex. With it going on 3+ yrs., I’m thinking I am only kidding myself that there could be a change. I am constantly doubting the chances of any M survival. Time is ticking away and with her being so stubborn, as well as her family telling her to leave me, I foresee this process is to get through next June and then one of us will be filing docs. Maybe she is thinking between now and then she can solidify the friend status and walk without too much arguing and stress. This process is draining and wearing me down. Maybe good strategy on her behalf?

With the info here, I need to GAL, which seems difficult due to the chores around the farm. I could and think I need to spend more time in my shop and not be with her when she wants to watch tv. Best part is I can watch tv in shop and work on projects needing completion. I can spend more time at work as there is plenty I can do there but with her trust issues, I it best if I am home vs at the office.

Have had 2 episodes where she has seemed to think there has been a 3 rd person, one where I made a post on FB which was a quote, and the other as a recommended friend to her sister that this person was a friend of mine. Both have no merit at all but there was a point to each issue. That was W was not happy at all thinking there was another person and she was angry about both. I read her anger as being jealousy. If she wants a D, why would she be soo angry, and why would she even care. I would think she would act the opposite if she is done with me. It’s like “I don’t want you, but nobody else can have you”. There isn’t anyone, period, but the response makes me think there must be something there to try building on. I feel there are soo many mixed actions that I am starting to wonder if I’m reading more into these actions and statements than I should. So confusing.

Maybe as a man I just want it fixed and it isn’t going to be fixed on my time...

AS, R2C, sandi2 and others that may be able to shed light, I would really appreciate any advice!

Zip