I guess the hardest part for me is just accepting that I need to just "let go and never look back" .. After sharing my story with co-workers, family, and friends that I am close to... even my counselor.. there literally has not been a single person that says I should take her back. Even knowing that I did neglect her, did emotionally or verbally abuse (yell at) her from time to time. (Absolutely no controlling behaviors at all on my part other than when I did suspect her of cheating right at the very end)
I mean I want to say I agree with them, especially as much as I have already managed to emotionally and physically detach from her.. But 12 years of history and being so close to someone is just so tough to so quickly turn my back on. These forums and others are full of people with similar stories that have either moved on or (smaller chance) have gotten back together and claim that the post-affair/post-divorce relationship is far better than the one previously.
Her mother left her father for 8 months when they were our exact age with a 4 year old. (Can't remember if I included this in the post) She eventually came back around and they've been married for about 30~ years (however, seems more for financial/children/convenience than "love"). However at our wedding her dad cried during the daughter-dad dance and begged her to be more loving than her mother had been to him because he was miserable.
I do come from a Christian background and I just hate to have to see my child lose his family unit without much effort from both parties to really commit to keeping it together. I feel that if by some small chance she makes the changes she needs to make and comes back around in 6 mos-2 yrs, would it be silly to give it another shot?
