1. tonight I'm not going to have an talks about the marriage. I will just trick or treat and get the eff out of there after. 2. I'm going to limit my interactions with my wife either by text or phone. 3. This will give me time to read up on boundaries and validation. I feel I've been making too many mistakes in this process. my mind is everywhere these days. 4. I heard of a book called After the Affair. I'm treating her posting nudes as an affair. 5. I'm going to do some project around the house that I have put off. It's a good time with the kids gone because they can be distracting.
Good luck. It's going to be really challenging, the first couple days. If she wants to say things about the R, it's okay to just listen and gather information. if she asks questions or for decisions that make you tense or you aren't 100% confident about, a good stock line is "Let me think about it." Few decisions need to be made on the spot. Most can wait a few hours, or overnight, or in a few days.
