I think you are all right. I have been afraid of establishing a new normal. Afraid of being friend zoned and her getting used to be "separated". Well the fear is gone. I went to the gym with a new workout buddy today and it did me wonders. I am so OVER W and her crap. She said she would go to the store today to get ingredients for dinner and on the way home tells me she didn't go. Now I had to go on the way home from the gym and I am no longer even going to cook the dinner. All she does is let me down.

Today she also asked about my plans for Thanksgiving. I told her My family has plans, but the cost and travel is a concern. She said don't worry about cost, go if I want. Then she said her mom needs to know if she will be joining them, but that means I am here with the dogs, alone for Thanksgiving. Was frustrated I didn't have an immediate answer, had the audacity to say this whole situation was frustrating her. She also mentioned a trip she is apparently planning with a guy she met while she was away. Immediately I am red flagged. This was my original suspect for a potential OM (albeit with a few major flaws to the theory). I haven't heard of him since she got back and thought I was crazy. Now she tells me they have been trying to go to Vegas (remember her gambling addiction) and he offered to buy her plane ticket a few weeks ago when they had a three day weekend! She said it was too short notice and maybe they will go for Veteran's Day. I told her we needed to discuss finances. I am worried about the debt that is in now in my name as we had a plan to consolidate some costs from the move and not pay interest until next year. I am no longer comfortable letting it sit and told her I need a large portion paid monthly. She said no problem, give her the plan and she will pay (my plan to come up with, apparently, even though it is OUR debt). Then she says she will make it work, she is not limiting herself if she wants to take trips. I guess she knows how to create money out of thin air now.

I am feeling enraged and fed up. Honestly, if I had evidence of the A right now, I would tell her to leave. I don't care about the risk of her not paying. I will figure it out. I am not going to sit taking care of the house and dogs while she takes trips to see potential OM. No way. I'm not Mr Nice Guy anymore, maybe I will fight her for the house and everything else. She set herself up to be screwed by divorce. Why not give it to her. I am venting a bit right now, but this feels like a turning point for me. The only way I will ever consider recon is if she is on her knees begging and I don't see it happening. In the meantime I don't want to waste another ounce of my time or energy on her and all this misery she has created. I am so angry she has caused this daily distress for me, TWICE in two years now. And to think she is probably down there messaging some other guy, I just can't. Someone talk me down from the ledge.