I think in one hand she is trying to say "you don't pay enough attention to me" and possibly wants to feel desired by you. On the other hand, the way she went about seeking attention WAS FROM OTHER MEN!! By posting nude photos of her self to them to FEEL DESIRED. Do you see the distinguishing line here? Do you see how logic and feelings can be conflicting? Her FEELLINGS to be desired are stronger than her morals and commitment to her husband.

I was at a club this weekend at a Halloween party. Since I walk and dance to the beat of my own drum. I was doing my own thing and dancing and having a good time just all by myself. There was this woman there who was dancing in her own corner for about two solid hours. Her myself and my friend started talking with her. Came to find out she was married and there by herself and her husband was home. My friend later told me to ditch the conversation and he explained to me that he recognized that girl and you seen her there 3 years in a row doing the same exact thing without her husband.

now either she likes to dance and will do whatever she needs to do to express herself with her husband comes along or not or shares that with her. Or she is seeking attention and validation which he's not getting at home. What I'm trying to say is if they're not getting something they will go out elsewhere and seek it. if they were openly expressive and communicative about these things then it would be our responsibility to attempt to fulfill it. However keep in mind that once boundaries are crossed, and our spouses start seeking attention from other men regardless of how small or how large the infraction is. DO NOT LET THEIR FEELINGS HOLD YOUR RESPONSIBLE IN JUSTIFYING THEM CHEATING. But acknowledge communicate and validate how they feel and if they haven't crossed too many lines in the sand as far as what you're willing to tolerate then keep an open mind when they come onto if they come on to you that's a good thing. But be firm. How do you be firm? Shame isn't going to get you anywhere. You have to let her know that you know what's going on and call her out on her BS not communicating and sending nude pictures to other men is unacceptable and you will not tolerate that in an open marriage. On the other hand you still want to be cool calm and collected and be open to any advances that she may make but take it for what it is in that moment and not hold any expectations to it whatsoever. By all means pay attention to her actions and not her words. Now may or may not be the time to do this I would ask the experts here but I would demand that you see her phone. If she tries to shame you in to being that you are controlling at that request. You tell her that you are not controlling her that she's free to do whatever she wishes at her own will. And that you are offering her two choices. either she chooses to submit to your request to rebuild the trust within the relationship, or she can walk.

Ask the vets here first. This is just my two cents.