I didn't interact with the wife much. My wife kept asking if something was wrong. I just said I was tired from work. I tried to avoid one-on-one conversations. She also propositioned me a couple of times and I said no. She actually came into the bedroom only wearing a robe and flashed me. I think it was to get a reaction.
OK so you are acting cold and weird around her based on your knowledge that she's posting nudes to a sex site and claiming she's in an open marriage, but you didn't TELL her you know despite our advice so try and picture how this looks to her. You are acting sad and mopey and ignoring her and her advances for what appears to her to be no reason at all. That is classic passive/aggressive behavior. She's going to think she's JUSTIFIED in her actions because of your cold attitude towards her, you're inadvertently pushing her back to that site. I'm not suggesting you turn on the charm and put the moves on her, but I do think you should have told her that you know what she's been up to.
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A few things. I did sign up for the site. I decided that I needed to see what was going on a regular basis. She didn't post anything this weekend, thankfully.
And if she does again, what's your plan of action?
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I don't want to make myself more attractive to the opposite sex now. I don't care about other women and this point and frankly I'm baffled why a pro marriage site would say this is ok.
Are you referring to Ovr's comment?
Originally Posted by ovrrnbw
I think you need to work on sex appeal and attraction with your W.
He specifically said "with your W", not other women. If you're interested in DB'ing then do try and understand and absorb what you're reading rather than putting your own spin on it. I know what you're going through is tough and it's hard to think straight, believe me I do know. Just keep working at it.
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Then I could avoid the confrontation and hope that she'd stop doing this.
So you are actually avoiding the confrontation then. At least you got that in the open. Here's the problem- she's already done illicit activities and even if she stops there still needs to be a confrontation (discussion) about it. The damage is already done, and you're both living with the fallout. The problem is only one of you knows that right now.
