Saw H today at work. I broke a bunch of DB rules but wondering what to think of a couple comments he made.
My biggest obstacle when I don't see or talk to him much is that I want to get a "status" check on how he is feeling towards me. I know it is wrong & I need to stop myself from doing it. When we interact more often like in the past, I think I am more patient because I know I will see him again soon.
Anyway, we talked for a bit at work. I asked him if it was okay if his mom took me to the airport since she offered & he has had a problem w/ me talking to his family. He said he was going to suggest it to me, but is trying not to be nice to me. I asked why not be nice? It makes things easier if we are nice to each other. He just smiled. I was getting ready to leave & said "well, I'll have fun on my trip in case you were wondering". He shrugged his shoulders. I said that even if we weren't together, he didn't have to hate me or not care about me at all. (I know - really bad DBing...it gets worse ) He said he doesn't hate me but the feeleing are just not there anymore. I said so you never miss me at all & he said "I live a lonely life now & try to not think about things like that." He is living w/ buddy & his fiance from work. Sounds like he doesn't go out or do much besides w/ them.
So, I don't want to grasp at straws here, but I think that he doesn't want to see or think about me because he has conviced himself that he doesn't love me anymore (ILYBNILWY) & that he is making the right decision & doesn't want to question it at all. He told me before he moved home the last time that he thought he didn't want to be w/ me but then saw me at work & stuff & realized he missed me. Guess I am looking for anything to keep me positive.
Saw him again at the end of the day & we chatted for a few minutes again. He talked about going bowling, out dancing, etc w/ his sister & friends, I asked why he never wanted to do anything like that w/ me. He said I was trying to start trouble & he doesn't want to talk to me at all anymore if I do that. I said I was not trying to start trouble just curious. Guess I should have validated his feelings.
Looking forward to vacation but will be hard since last time I went to my sister's he was w/ me & it was really fun because it was his 1st trip anywhere & we enjoyed hanging out w/ my sister & BIL. Feeling sad about it tonight. Feel detached alot but hate it when these feelings creep back in.
) He said he doesn't hate me but the feeleing are just not there anymore. I said so you never miss me at all & he said "I live a lonely life now & try to not think about things like that." He is living w/ buddy & his fiance from work. Sounds like he doesn't go out or do much besides w/ them.
