On emotional boundaries, I think what was meant was you need to detach your emotions from her actions.and words. That is detachment. Is it hard? One of the hardest things you will ever do. But, if you can do that it will set you free. As I said, google "self-differentiation in marriage", it is another way of describing healthy, loving, emotional detachment.
Having your happiness tied to another person's, even a spouse's, words and deeds is a dangerous way to live. And if you think about it, it isn't even fair to put that on another human-being. Especially as CW pointed out, you have no control over anyone except yourself.
IA, yes this is all confusing. Very confusing. In my sitches (both of them) I was more confused than at any other point in my life. It gets worse before it gets better......but it does get better.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
