I agree with a few of the others with the phone . If you have set time aside with her and she is distracted or messaging AP just walk away . I agree with not putting a time frame on someone’s phone use.
I think I posted on someone’s sitch about a boundary I did with H. He has a bad habit of raising his voice . Always escalated between us . He did this few weeks ago . I stated if you raise your voice again I will hang up . He raised his voice . So I hung up . He then called a ton back . I didn’t answer . He sent nasty messages . I responded the same thing . You tell- I hang up . You send me nasty messages - I won’t respond . Last time it’s happened . See the boundary was mainly for me . I know how we escalate fights so I chose to eliminate it . It’s not even an option.
If you allow her to come in after drinking and stay . You have relayed that it’s ok . Simple and to the point . You come over drunk -I will not open the door .
Once you start becoming more confident with boundaries you will get better at them . She will argue or try to over them . Ignore it . H tried to say he didn’t use any name calling or bad language I should not have hung up . I didn’t budge on my stance you raise your voice - I hang up .
Good job on not texting first or calling . Try getting off phone first and being busy. I know how hard it is .
